One of the downsides of my current circumstances is the extent to which 29 years in the Midwest did not prepare my body for what Georgia was going to do to it. Heat, I knew there would be heat. Humidity too. But the pollen? Good lord, the pollen. It's so heavy in the spring that one's car is covered in a layer, as fine as cake flour, of green pollen every morning. After a few weeks of this a mighty thunderstorm comes along and treats us to three days of green rain, approximately the hue and consistency of Ecto Cooler. But in the fall it's just a barrage of silent killers. I see no pollen. I know only that I can't breathe and I'd love to scoop both eyes out with a melon baller.

It is 11 PM on Wednesday, the usual "time to start writing a post" hour, and my eyes are virtually swollen shut by…whatever Georgia uses to attack me. Not only am I unable to stare at the screen for very long through burning eyes, but my ability to be interesting is severely compromised. So here is a pair of images that came across my social networking feeds on Wednesday. Please decide which one is more troubling, for I cannot. Also, enrich your mind for a few minutes with the musings of the Discovery Channel hostage-taker, God rest his crazy, crazy ass.

The question is no longer if America is doomed but if it is worth saving at this point.