The real NPF is on the way, but until then please enjoy the following:

1. A gentleman in Mississippi claims to have shot the Chupacabra. The local newspaper's coverage includes quotes like:

The Mississippi Department of Wildlife and Fisheries reports the "Chupacabra" is a coyote with mange.

Locals, however, are not having any of it.

"I told him there ain't no way because, look at it," Hewharrell said.

I don't know how in the hell anyone can be a local newspaper reporter in Mississippi.

2. Rush Limbaugh wrote a history-adventure book for children. Only 102 shopping days until Christmas.