Having just driven 1000-plus miles in three days, I can't work up the sap for the post planned for Monday. Trust me though, whenever I spent 15-20 hours alone in a car on empty rural roads, a handful of epic posts usually follows.

In the meantime, I have two new nominees for the Worst Place in America: Joplin, MO and Fort Smith, AR. Don't give me the tornado excuse for Joplin. And Fort Smith would be vastly improved by a few EF4s. I continue to maintain that the worst actual city (not tiny rural pile of rubble) in the country is Fresno, though God knows there are plenty of contenders (everything in upstate NY, Reading PA, Worcester MA, Peoria IL, South Bend IN, Houston, and a handful of other Rust Belt atrocities in Ohio and Michigan). Nonetheless, both Joplin and "The Fort" merit strong consideration.

On the plus side, if you want to feel thin and smart, you'll be king of the world in either place.