ARTICLE IV: THE RIGHT TO GET BLOWN THE FUCK UP

Am I the only one who has a hard time taking the daily horse-race coverage of the Iraqi Constitution seriously?

Unless it's bulletproof or made of some sort of Earth-space metal compound that repels terrorists like Kryptonite, I really can't see how this document changes or will change anything. Let's all shit ourselves with excitement – a government that couldn't run its Iraq for five minutes without a massive occupying force from the U.S. has a Constitution! This is even neater than those elections they had!

iraq.jpg
The Council debates the use of the phrase "cannon fodder" in the Iraqi Army charter

That Iraqi Assembly sure is cute. They're like a high school student council with more spirit. As you recall from your high school days, the primary function of the student council was to teach kids how democracy works – you debate, bargain, and vote with big smiles on your faces in order to legitimate decisions over which you have no control to begin with. And if you start getting any big ideas, the Principal comes down the hall and straightens things out.

I wonder if they included something about getting a new salad bar in the Iraqi National Cafeteria?

assembly.jpg
"Hey, where did this 'Article 27 – Oath of Undying Fealty to Exxon' come from?"

Keep this in mind as we watch Washington react to the rumored nationalization of Iraq's oil reserves and the use of sharia as the foundation for the legal system in the draft "Constitution". Something tells me that a few last-minute suggestions from Washington will end up sneaking into the final product.

Be Sociable, Share!

One Response to “ARTICLE IV: THE RIGHT TO GET BLOWN THE FUCK UP”

  1. Samantha Says:

    I think you've hit the proverbial nail squarely on the head.