The authors of this site are unashamed to admit that we collectively dedicated about 6 hours of our lives on Saturday to watching this video in incrementally higher levels of resolution (YouTube to large monitor to downloaded and burned in full DVD quality played through an HDTV).

We are simply floored at Samwell's level of homosexuality, and I am almost speechless as I try to provide you with words that convey it. I cannot. Just watch the video, and if YouTube proves insufficient to communicate his gayness (as it did for us) then head over to Samwell's production company – "Brownmark Films" – and download the DVD-ready 1GB file. It is worth it.

I strongly suspect that Samwell was created in a laboratory by a team of gay artisan-scientists working exclusively in the medium of gay. He is composed of parts gleaned from lesser gays and was created with the intention of turning Islamic fundamentalists gay in secret CIA prisons.

It might work.

Regardless, we do have cause to question one of Samwell's claims – that he is "delicate like a flower" and therefore anyone who accepts his challenge to put it in his butt must be gentle. We are skeptical. Something tells me that Samwell's anus is actually quite rugged, proving relatively accomodating to a variety of objects inserted with various, and sometimes minimal, levels of gentleness.

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