THE NEW REAL

Since 2008 we've had the distinct pleasure of watching so many people on the right go absolutely insane. Aside from having let their deepest paranoid fantasies run amok, they've descended into using some sort of coded language that centers around repeating phrases like Solyndra, Benghazi, Fast & Furious, Pelosi, Obamacare, and Death Panels. And now someone has gone ahead and written it down to prove the point.

This is one of the most insane things I've ever seen in writing, and remember that I am a person who enjoys writing things that intentionally make the least possible sense. Somehow reality has one-upped me. A failed academic turned failed author named Sarah Hoyt has written a Teabagging screed called, I shit you not, "I Am Spartacus." Here's an excerpt, and you should treat yourself to the whole thing.

I am Spartacus because Fast and Furious.

I am Spartacus because Benghazi.

I am Spartacus because Fast and Furious.

I am Spartacus because Benghazi.

I am Spartacus because Fast and Furious.

I am Spartacus because Benghazi.

To stop the crazy train, to preserve as much as I can of the greatest nation the world has ever known, I Am Spartacus.

To this end I pledge my life, my fortune and my sacred honor.

And no, I don't think it's a joke. This has long since stopped being just a game.

The funny part is that this was widely circulated. People read this batshit nuttery and not only thought it was great but also forwarded it to others. Glenn Reynolds was moved beyond words.

Their echo chamber reminds me of grad school in a big college town, where everyone drank like a Scottish football hooligan. You go out on an average evening and have a dozen beers and you think absolutely nothing of it because everyone else around you – your entire social and professional circle – does exactly the same. It never occurs to you that, well, maybe that's too much to drink. It's not until you step out of that environment that you that it becomes apparent.

Well, the right wingers have created such an elaborate bubble that they never need to step out of it. It's a brand new reality wherein everyone is barking mad and no one gives it a second thought when you decide to smear yourself in flan and run around brandishing a mace and screaming something about IRS-gate.

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60 Responses to “THE NEW REAL”

  1. sluggo Says:

    @ xynee
    yep lots of stars Amazon.

    But where was her story about Father Obama and the Death Beagles. Oh wait someone else wrote that one.

  2. Xynzee Says:

    @sluggo: LOL
    Also props for: "The War of Southern Treason"

  3. Amused Says:

    Not to argue with Ms. Spartacus or anything (because that would be pointless), but given conservatives' relentless and deliberate efforts to wreck the economy and the endless whining about the poors getting to live a bit longer than they should on free foodstamps and unearned health care, her reference to Holodomor is ironic indeed.

  4. Glen h Says:

    Can someone explain the Fast and Furious reference to me as well as the chain mail bikini one? American is not my first language and many things she says don't make sense to me.

  5. Justin Jordan Says:

    Fast and furious: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ATF_gunwalking_scandal

    No idea about chain mail bikinis, except possibly that she really hates Star Wars.

  6. Xjmueller Says:

    Chain mail bikini? Google says…. http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ChainmailBikini

    It's related to sci-fi apparently -a trope according to the cite. Makes sense if Hoyt is a SF writer

  7. Xjmueller Says:

    And this gem. Who knew this stuf existed? Not me, until now…
    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=x1wREUcgYgQ&feature=plpp

    Wow. Just wow. Weirdness abounds.

  8. Glen h Says:

    Thanks for the explanation, she makes more sense now…kinda!

  9. Tim Says:

    Honestly, I think it would have been a net improvement if she just replaced that wall of text with "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR OBAMAMAAAAAAAAA".

  10. IR Says:

    I read it expecting "I am Spartacus, because of Obamacare death panels" and left disappointed when it wasn't in there.

    Hyper-partisan minds are usually insane and she's just another example of it.