ISLAMOTURKEY

This Thanksgiving, will you be part of the problem or part of the solution? The problem, of course, is the stealth Islamofascistication of America. Can even Thanksgiving, that most secular of holidays, be part of America's inexorable slouch toward Sharia Law? According to Pammy Gellar (on the wildly misnamed "American Thinker") it sure the fuck is:

In my book Stop the Islamization of America: A Practical Guide to the Resistance, I report at length on the meat industry's halal scandal: its established practice of not separating halal meat from non-halal meat, and not labeling halal meat as such. And back in October 2010, I reported more little-noted but explosive new revelations: that much of the meat in Europe and the United States is being processed as halal without the knowledge of the non-Muslim consumers who buy it.

I discovered that only two plants in the U.S. that perform halal slaughter keep the halal meat separated from the non-halal meat, and they only do so because plant managers thought it was right to do so. At other meat-packing plants, animals are slaughtered following halal requirements, but then only a small bit of the meat is actually labeled halal.

Now here is yet more poisonous fruit of that scandal.

A citizen activist and reader of my website AtlasShrugs.com wrote to Butterball, one of the most popular producers of Thanksgiving turkeys in the United States, asking them if their turkeys were halal. Wendy Howze, a Butterball Consumer Response Representative, responded: "Our whole turkeys are certified halal."

In a little-known strike against freedom, yet again, we are being forced into consuming meat slaughtered by means of a torturous method: Islamic slaughter.

Umm…what?

Non-Muslims in America and Europe don't deserve to have halal turkey forced upon them in this way, without their knowledge or consent. So this Thanksgiving, fight for your freedom. Find a non-halal, non-Butterball turkey to celebrate Thanksgiving this Thursday. And write to Butterball and request, politely but firmly, that they stop selling only halal turkeys, and make non-halal turkeys available to Americans who still value our freedoms.

It's abundantly clear that Pamela Gellar is seriously mentally ill, and her story is going to end in one of two ways: heavily sedated in a mental institution or bleeding out in a hail of police gunfire after her shooting rampage in a crowded mosque.

This year I am thankful that I am not as stupid as the people who come up with these idiotic conspiracies.

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38 Responses to “ISLAMOTURKEY”

  1. GeneJockey Says:

    While working for the biggest producer of applesauce in America, my Dad was at one time responsible for responding to customer complaints. One yahoo wrote in to complain about the Orthodox Union's 'OU' symbol denoting Kosher certification. He said he didn't think he should have to pay extra for this because he wasn't Jewish.

    So my Dad carefully calculated all the costs associated with Kosher certification, divided it by how many cases of apple sauce it covered, and sent the guy a nice note offering to sent him a check for $0.0001.

    Congratulations to Pam Gellar. She's now officially THAT STUPID.

  2. theotherspartan Says:

    Not even during the deepest of my post-T-day dinner food comas have I ever given a damn how the bird was slaughtered.

  3. Glen.h Says:

    Substitute "Jewish" for "Muslim" and "Kosher" for "Halal" and you get the idea what kind of nasty piece of work this Gellar person is. On second thoughts, scrub that- the name of her website says it all…

  4. daphne Says:

    It's also clear than Gellar is terminally boring, which is almost as bad as stupid.

  5. Brkly guy Says:

    "…. its established practice of not separating halal meat from non-halal meat, and not labeling halal meat as such."
    Should we be thankful that even Ms. Gellar has come to see the desirability of regulation?

  6. Arslan Says:

    Yes, Kosher slaughter has often been attacked by Neo-Nazis and anti-Semites, and this "Halal scandal" is identical to the so-called "Kosher tax" urban legend which has spread far and wide within anti-Semitic circles.

    As far as I know, Halal slaughter does not differ greatly from Kosher slaughter in terms of procedure. As long as the animal is not consecrated to some other god, it is Halal.

    This is also irrelevant because Muslims can eat anything that is certified as Kosher, which is one other reason why many US firms have their products so certified.

  7. Tim H. Says:

    As if there was a nickel's difference between halal or kosher, or either one was any less nutritious. I think a somewhat less urban response fits here:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLG2jaVdUMo

  8. canuckistani Says:

    Geller's expose last year indicates that she has not a fucking clue about the difference between Jewish kosher and Islamic halal slaughter
    (http://www.humanevents.com/article.php?id=39442). Kosher and Halal traditions of slaughter are in a practical sense the same – the techniques for killing the animal are basically identical in each system (http://blsciblogs.baruch.cuny.edu/dollarsandsense/2010/06/22/kosher-or-halal-american-muslims-debate-which-food-certifications-to-follow/). The blessing is different however, which is why Geller has her panties in a knot, though as others have said, I imagine she would shit a brick over secret kosher infiltration if this were 1921 and not 2011. As she states in her shrill piece from last year: "The issue for many Christians is that in halal slaughter, an imam offers the animal up as a sacrifice to Allah which makes it meat sacrificed to idols."

    But surely the methods used by "Christians" (I assume she just means Americans) are better? You can read about them in this long, detailed pdf from the USDA Food Safety Inspection Service: http://www.fsis.usda.gov/pdf/psit_turkey.pdf. The turkeys are stunned, their throats slit and bodies drained, and then they are scalded to remove feathers etc etc. Not that different, though I guess maybe "Christian" slaughter would require immigrant workers to run all the machines and have no health insurance or unions. In any event, strict halal also requires the animal be slaughtered by a Muslim. Unless Hamas and Hezbollah have really set up camp in Mexico, secretly converted thousands of unskilled Mexican migrant workers to Islam, and then slipped them over the border on buses headed directly to Butterball plants, this is probably not happening. I imagine a rabbi and an imam come in to the plants to inspect the slaughter facilities and then bless them – these are mass industrial processes with millions of birds a year being slaughtered and profit margins based on turnover time and volume. They're not slowing down so each animal can be individually blessed as it dies.

    In other words, Geller's fears are misplaced (no shit, right?). She should be happy that mass industrial consumer society based on market principles has watered down the meaning of halal to the point where mechanized slaughter, non-Muslim slaughtermen, and a new privately-owned and managed food certification industry has blossomed. Instead, she can't even stomach her turkey because some guy standing over a moving belt filled with thousands of upside down birds awaiting the knife said they were for Allah. Maybe she should just eat pork chops for Thanksgiving.

  9. c u n d gulag Says:

    GOP POV:
    Them Halal's turkey is bad enough!

    But think about the ultimate in horrors and miscegenation – the mixed race "turducken!"

    What kind of an amoral atheist deviant takes the turkey, America's National Bird, the bird with the most WHITE meat, and inter-breeds them with stupid chickens, and them dark meat, web-footed, ducks?

    What?
    Oh, you kill the chicken, put it inside the damned duck, stuff 'em both in the turkey, and bake 'em?
    That does sound good!

    Can we make N*gC*inkUslims, where we kill the N*gger's, put "em inside the damn Ch*nk's, stuff 'em both into Muslim's, and bake 'em?
    Now THAT"S a meal I'd GIVE THANKS FOR!!!

  10. Sarah Says:

    In addition to what has already been said, I will point out that halal and kosher slaughter both require that an animal be killed in the quickest and most compassionate manner possible, avoiding as much pain and discomfort to the animal as possible (according to the Wikipedia entry on Dhabihah, the Islamic term for ritual slaughter of an animal for consumption, which I found by doing a quick and dirty search for halal slaughter):

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dhabihah

    So, in other words, what the anti-halal crowd are saying is that they want meat from animals that are slaughtered as cruelly and painfully as possible. Holy fucking shit, these neocons are assholes.

    What's really ironic on top of all that is that Geller is herself Jewish.

  11. bb in GA Says:

    Every wise thing y'all said on this (dammit we gotta get that K symbol off stuff too!)

    However, for a significant portion of the US population, Thanksgiving is definitely NOT "that most secular of holidays"

    //bb

  12. Major Kong Says:

    "It's abundantly clear that Pamela Gellar is seriously mentally ill, and her story is going to end in one of two ways:"

    GOP presidential front-runner or state governor?

  13. comrade x Says:

    Once again I wish I lacked a conscience and could scribble down some flawed logic hatin' on Muslims and sell my latest collection of internet posts as a " book" to the mouthbreathing " trrue Americans" in Dumbfuckistan.
    Unfortunately I was raised by secular humanists who installed an irritating moral code in me.

  14. Arslan Says:

    Gellar pulled her support for some anti-Muslim group in England(EDL I think) because she said she detected anti-Semitic tones to the rhetoric of some of their members(SURPRISE!). Now here she is repackaging an anti-Jewish meme as an anti-Muslim one.

    Seriously, this "atlas" needs to shrug, by which I mean fuck off.

  15. Middle Seaman Says:

    I admit, not only did I kill Julius Cesar, but I also ask my Muslim students to bring a halal turkey to our thanksgiving dinners. I'll do it again. In Ramadan, I join them at break fast (I don't pray with them though).

  16. Ellie Says:

    Well, I for one find the War on Non-Halal Turkey to be a refreshing alternative distraction to the War on Christmas. (At this point, the latter is probably more like a Never-ending Occupation of Christmas – so it was definitely time to open a new front in a nearby holiday.)

  17. Mr. Prosser Says:

    Let's eat.

  18. Alan C Says:

    Canuckistani included this quote from Geller: "The issue for many Christians is that in halal slaughter, an imam offers the animal up as a sacrifice to Allah which makes it meat sacrificed to idols."

    This is interesting to me because Christian scripture (I Corinthians 8:1-13) actually addresses the issue of whether Christians can eat meat sacrificed to idols. St. Paul says it's not inherently wrong and is a matter of individual conscience–just don't do it if you think it will be "a stumbling block to the weak," i.e., one's fellow Christians who have weaker consciences.

    Besides, strictly speaking Allah is not an "idol" since Muslims don't believe in graven images.

  19. Desargues Says:

    She's just throwing red meat to the savage animals who are her following, folks. People like her aren't running for mainstream office, they're just grifting the losers. So you have to up the ante every time if you wanna keep them dollars coming. Who's gonna write you a check to stop the Islamization of America if all you give them is critical reporting and reasonable arguments? It'd be like selling philosophical theology to the halfwits in pews. Grifter gonna grift, people. Although it woudl be funny to watch the Geller lady foaming at the mouth in a straitjacket.

    I'm with Mr Prosser here: Let's eat. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. I'm thankful to this country for not having pepper-sprayed me in the face — yet.

  20. Mo Says:

    Turkey geeking, anyone?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=eYxn2vlhtWo#t=0s

    As an Alaskan resident, I never tire of this.

  21. Ken Says:

    Besides, strictly speaking Allah is not an "idol" since Muslims don't believe in graven images.

    That too. Though the stronger argument is that Allah is the same God that Pamela Gellar worships.

  22. Arslan Says:

    "That too. Though the stronger argument is that Allah is the same God that Pamela Gellar worships."

    Allah isn't money or attention!

  23. A Babe of the Boom Says:

    May the blessings of the prophet be upon you, Ed for bringing to light this woman's particular and peculiar form of insanity!

    Merry Christmas & Happy New Year, all!!

  24. jazzbumpa Says:

    After arriving late, I was going to make the point that Ken made, but he beat me to it. Christianity and Islam are both derived from Judaism. Without dispute, they all worship the same god. "Sacrificed to idols" is so screamingly stupid that I can't even ridicule it. It ridicules itself.

    We had a fresh Amish Turkey. No preservatives. Probably slaughtered by flogging with buggy whips.

    It was way better than a fucking Kosher/Halla Butterball.

    Oh, well. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.

    JzB

  25. HoosierPoli Says:

    Halal and kosher slaughtering rules require the cutting of all three neck blood vessels in one stroke (also accomplished automatically when beheading a turkey) and the recital of some magic worlds. The only reason you would give a serious goddamn about whether your food is "halal" is if you believe magic words have power.

    In which case, I hope you never ate a kosher hotdog, or you're now a filthy heathen Jew.

  26. freeportguy Says:

    As I saying, President Bush was wrong: the Talibans didn't follow us home, and they didn't need to, because we already have our own… US born and raised..

  27. T Says:

    Wtf Ed, have you been to townhall recently?

    Everything article there is begging for a fjm…

  28. David R Says:

    I'm finding it hard to believe that Butterball actually hires an Imam to give a Muslim blessing onsite, as Gellar suggests. Is it safe to assume that Butterball is simply cross-labeling its Kosher turkeys as Halal, or am I just being a "loony lib"?

  29. ConcernedCitizen Says:

    Tim H: "As if there was a nickel's difference between halal or kosher, or either one was any less nutritious. I think a somewhat less urban response fits here:"

    Honestly, I thought you meant to write "a less URBANE response" and had linked to a video with much yelling and swearing (presumably directed at Pamela Gellar).

    I was pleasantly surprised.

  30. Carrstone Says:

    "Umm, what?" indeed!

    All of you should thank your god or idol, or whatever you worship, that you live in a country where you have a choice: to halal or not halal. And even more, you should be grateful that you can write the BS you do on such a non-story, without comeback.

    Reading this blog is always an eye-opener: Ed lays down a trail and the rest of you chase after it like hounds after the hare, baying in agreement as you go.

  31. Xynzee Says:

    On the topic of foods, this has to have my favourite "uh, ooopps!" factor to it ever:
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/7852168.stm

    Hope you've been good little capitalist sycophants and were out there spend spend spending it up today. ;)

  32. Major Kong Says:

    @Xynzee

    Oh dear. I pretty much lived on Doner Kebabs when I was in Munich. I found the German food to be a bit bland for my tastes.

  33. HoosierPoli Says:

    @Major Kong

    New study: delicious fast food found to be unhealthy. News at 11.

  34. bb in GA Says:

    HP:

    You, of course, know what you meant…but how you said it triggered an ancient memory.

    In the world of local TV even into the 70s there used to be a standard tease when they had something "big" to show (you know a big car wreck, apartment fire) that broke sometime after the 6 PM newscast.

    "BLAH BLAH BLAH,… Film at 11"

    The reason they did this and couldn't tease with an actual clip is that the tech was in the "dark room" developing the film (remember that?) so they could run it at 11.

    Videotaping equipment was still expensive and hadn't penetrated all the way to Hickville

    //bb

  35. Xynzee Says:

    @bb: your comment reminds me of a Bloom County series, where because of the explosion in the number of "mini-cam"* crews they have to start culling them. It was for the benefit of the entire mini-cam population after all.

    *mini-cams? I'm sure under many OH&S regs those things would require a mechanised boom, never mind the batteries and the tape decks.

  36. Ken Says:

    @bb: One I actually heard once: "Is a toxic cloud drifting toward your neighborhood? Tune in at 11 to find out."

    The answer was "no, but OMG it might if there were a train derailment! Which hasn't happened either." I have no idea why they green-lighted the story, unless it was sweeps month.

  37. Ursula Says:

    If teabaggers are so concerned, they should just have ham for thanksgiving. My family did that a few times while I was growing up, and no one really minded. I loved it, myself, since I loved ham as a kid and still dislike turkey.

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